I live in Minnesota.

This has been an insane last 5-7 days. All is well and Im finally moved in but there have been like 900 things on my mind and obstacles to overcome.

FIRST. I would like to say Uhaul in Buckhead off Peachtree St. right by the Kroger where it turns into Peachtree Industrial Blvd.....was fantastic. They were very helpful and I'm grateful for their generosity. long story short. I bought a hitch, took it to them to install, my car wouldn't allow them to install it, so they gave me a truck for about $150 cheaper than it would normally be because of all this mumbo-jumbo, last minute, unforeseen and unavoidable problems.

so. $640 later, we're on the road.

I'll miss you Atlanta :(

Then we went through Kentucky

oh lala Louisville

We then got to Indianapolis shortly after this picture....and slept at my Aunt's house that night after a great meal and a walk, we were in bed by 9:45. We got up at about 4:30am to get back on the road. Just as the sun was rising we went through Chicaghoe around 7ish.

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bears.

Guess where we went next??

we spent $30 on cheese. 

Wisconsin!

 The weather during the 2 days of travel was beautiful.....that is, until we hit Minnesota.

looking a little muggy minnesota...

oh, thanks for the welcome home party.

But the fun didnt stop there. In the midst of unpacking some necessary boxes from the back of the uhaul in the sprinkling rain. My cheapass flip flops from sears slipped and left this baby on my backside

awesome.

 Well, Im here in one piece (except for the mirror I was holding when I fell) and Auburn football starts in 3 days and my birthday is on Labor Day (5 days)...the next couple of days are gonna be crazy. I cant wait.

crigler OUT.

JUICY NEWS and Im moving in 24-48hrs

It's 5am and I cant sleep. shocker. It's been a couple of days since my last oh so deep, largely fonted post. But not only was yesterday my moms 1 year anniversary of marriage (skankydashian's wedding anniversary would've been the day before it---my how 294 days have flown by). Stay focused Courtney, the juicy news is.

My ex is gonna be a baby daddy.
(T-bird thats just my baby daddy)

I'm..... ugh. still feeling weird about it. Surely Im not the only one who feels this way after an ex and yourself parts ways....according to my calculations via bookface, they did the dirty like 3-4 months after he broke my ticker. Is that a rebound? Im sure I was still crying into my couch pillows by that point. jerk. 

He's having a girl and I cant help but feel the irony. He's not with the mother anymore I hear, but in more ways than one--he is...for like the next 18 years. I wonder if she's crazy? wouldn't that really stir the pot? crazy broads really get me going. Women are half as crazy as they are because of the crap they make up themselves in their brains. Im sure hormones aren't helping either. 

In way more important relevant news, my number one boo who didn't knock up his ex, Kevin is flying in this morning and I cant wait to have him help me pack see him! We have a new apartment that we're temporarily moving into in Eden Prairie, MN 

and in case you missed this list published a couple of days ago, BOOM.

NUMBER 3! (and my Alma Mater in at #89)

jeah.

We've got a 6 month lease and Im WAYYYYY excited. My first time living in sin with a boy! Don't tell pawpaw. Im almost 27, I think Im old enough. And we're not having babies or anything cray. Kevin is making offers on houses and fingers crossed, we'll have a home soon.

Kevin lands in about 4 hours then its off to get a hitch installed on my car, pick up the uhaul, pack up the 10 boxes that I haven't even assembled, and eat lunch at my favorite sushi restaurant. busy coco.

I forgot to mention...

My brother Drew got in a bad accident 3 days ago and this is my public service announcement to NOT USE CELL PHONES WHILE DRIVING. He broke his nose, teeth went through his lip, he was bloody and swollen, and bonus, totaled my moms 2012 Land Rover. Always wear your seatbelt and don't fiddle for your phone at midnight. ps. this is a quick way to end the feud with your mother. It scared me pretty bad and having to hear via a text from my aunt was less than ok. Mom said she tried to call but it didn't go through, f u T-Mobile. 

Have a happy Wednesday and take no one for granted. I love you, Drewby.

love.

Im moving in 1 week!

yep, you heard it here second people. I just told Facebook world a few minutes ago, and once its on facebook.....ITS FOR SERIOUS.

yea, so, thats about it for this post. Im about to cry my eyes into a bottle of wine because Im trying to figure out how to get a hitch installed on my car... and its proving impossible in my time frame OF A WEEK. wtf. I hate pep boys, by the way.

Im mainly focusing on eating at all my favorite places in the next 7 days. I gotta go. Simply Thai is calling my name, BYE

JLO got married

Im baaaaack. its been 6 days since my last post....I've been busy with everything for that wedding, being a taxi service for Kevin and Karla, trying not to die in the Alabama heat and packing my life up into boxes. its been nuts. 

The first problem started about an hour after my last post, I found out Kevin's flight was CANCELLED and rescheduled for Friday morning at 9am. Karla's was delayed like 3 hours and needless to say, we did not get to go to Montgomery that night. Luckily Kevin got on the 6am flight Friday morning, but then it was delayed and we just couldn't wait any longer. He ended up having to get a rental car and drive to Montgomery. I felt horrible! 

I hate you Delta.

The luncheon went fine, we got yummy food and cute gifts. 

bridesmaids at the luncheon

We took a nap afterwards then headed to the venue in BFE Lapine, Alabama.....like 45 minutes outside of Montgomery. Im surprised we had cell reception. 

The Old House at Meriwether

The rehearsal was quick and fun, then we headed to downtown Montgomery and called it a night at about 12am. 

MOH, Bride, MEEEEE, bridesmaid, bridesmaid

The morning of the wedding was also awesome, I was craving bang bang shrimp from Bonefish Grill....so we went there...and wouldn't you know it....they were unveiling their "brunch" menu the following day, so they were giving out the free menu that day to all "friends and family"...we soon became friends and family and got a free martini, appetizer, and entree's. it was amazing. 

We got to the venue in enough time for the bridal party to do ALL the junior bridesmaids hair. wtf. where are your parents? we do not have time to french braid 5 little girls ratty, tangled, sweaty, stinky hair while we are trying to get ourselves ready. ANNNNNNNNYWAY, we finally threw ourselves together and everything went off great. There were 2 kegs that were snuck in, however when the dad got wind of it, he took it upon himself to steal the tap when we weren't there guarding it. Needless to say, we took the party elsewhere to another middle of nowhere Alabama city. 

middle-of-nowhere after party

The weekend was fun and Im glad we all got to see our favorite country girl get married. Now they're in Jamaica mon....can't wait to see who gets married next!

-toodle loo

Its been exactly 4 years since.....

I GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE. 

whatttttttttttt. where did 4 years go? straight down the toilet as far as Im concerned. Here's a recap...

As I reflect on what has happened in my life the last 4 years, a few things come to mind..... 
Auburn won a National Championship, 
Cam Newton rules the free world, 
Obama has made everyone SUPER happy, 
I moved to Atlanta knowing only 1 person, 
I felt my first earthquake--all the way in Atlanta via Virginia, 
My mom beat me to the alter, 
I got fat then skinny then fat again, 
Corporate America sucks, 
I learned I should've went to grad school, 
Student loans are going to last forever, 
I met Chelsea Handler, 
BP killed thousands of innocent animals and turned the gulf coast into shit sand, 
I didn't win the largest Mega Millions Lottery ever, 
I bought a new car, 
Joe Pa was an old lying bastard,
Michael Jackson died,
Oprah went off the air and now Im depressed at 4pm daily,
Our president won a nobel peace prize- WTF,
Trannies can be in beauty pageants,
Tiger Woods is a scumbag,
and
We killed Osama Bin Laden!

Just to name a few.

Tomorrow are my twin sisters 11th birthday and I wont be there to celebrate due to the wedding on Saturday....I believe this is the first birthday I've ever missed of theirs :(

Im off to start my fantastic weekend in 2 short hours!!! My Kevin flies in at 6 and the maid of honor flies in at 8pm. Then we're all off to Montgomery tonight! Bridal luncheon tomorrow morning and probably "dry" wedding on Saturday....NO COMMENT.
tata stalkers!

One month until my birthday!!!!!

Yall better start shopping for my gift. T minus 30 days folks. 


Im dieting like an insane psychopath for the wedding I have to be in next weekend..so, excuse grumpy gills over here. I'm down 8 pounds and need probably like 5 more to successfully zip my dress, not have back fat, and be able to sit down without holding my breath......ahhhh the wonders of having a low backless dress. 

YUM

I almost ate the plate too.

Today is Olympics Day 7. There's only 10 days left.....then no more half naked Ryan Lochte, waaaaaaa. Also, Happy 28th Birthday Lochte----i love you mucho mucho.

Alright, I gotta go work out and get this bod ripped. psh. yea right. Im going to stare at cheetos till I pass out.

IM BAAAACK. and so are the Olympics!

SO. Its been a hot minute since I've written on here...apologies. It's been a craaazay weekend/beginning to the week!! First off, I went to Minneapolis for the weekend and it was amazing! I ended up getting Friday off work, so instead of my 9:40pm flight, I did standby for the 8:40am flight, and (due to 2 connection flights being late) I ended up getting on by the skin of my teeth. Thank the Lord. So Im beyond elated to get into town to see my love and spend the whole day doing whatever until the Opening Ceremony of the Olympics later that evening...


WELL, Mr. Kevin and his ding dong friends decided to go out the night before, lose their softball championship game, then go to dollar bowling at 10pm. Kevin ended up sleeping in Friday morning and forgot to pick me up at the airport. I sat at the airport for 1 hour and 45 minutes plotting my wrath to surely kill him when he did get there. I was beyond mad...there should be a new word invented for the rage I felt in ending his life. I'll stew on that for a little and get back to you. So when he picked me up, I ripped him a new one and he of course had nothing more to say besides how sorry he was. He was super sorry and I mean, how long can you really hold a grudge against someone who fully understands the level of their screw up. So eventually, after he apologized forever and ever, I got over it. THEN he decides to take me over to the house with all his friends that "peer pressured" him into drinking until Lord knows when in the morning. So I get there and those guys are an even hotter mess than Kevin was. They're all still in their stinky softball outfits and knee high socks. 


barf.


We all went to lunch and it was just dandy. Now, I'm super dooper excited about the Olympics. So after watching that terrrrrrible (said in Charles Barkley voice) Opening Ceremony, we couldn't take it anymore. (seriously, who wants to re-live the Industrial Revolution or see light up beds and huge baby heads?--NO ONE) 


We went out to start the weekend in downtown Minneapolis...Kevin then gets a text from his life long best friend (he is the 3rd baseman for the Twins--who recently got sent back down to the minors to improve his hitting) saying he's getting called back up and will play in tomorrow's game. Wouldn't you know it, we had tickets and we were already planning on going. PERFECT! His fiancé (they both went to high school with Kevin and I) was also coming into town and I was just tickled pink. Im going to her bachelorette party in October and haven't seen her in a few months.

Me, Jocelyn, and Joanna

I'd also like to note, these Minnesota fans are serious about some baseball. You can see that those seats are pretty much full...and they are currently the worst team in the league. The Marlins got a brand new stadium this year, Im pretty sure they couldn't pay people to come to their games. sad. (and they just got rid of all their players, idiots). The Twins ended up sweeping the Indians that weekend :)


Lets get down to the serious stuff. The Olympics.


I just looooooooooooove the Olympics, it shows me how unaccomplished and out of shape I am as a 26 year old female. But thats ok. I grew up doing gymnastics and cheerleading, so naturally I love watching gymnastics. I've been a fan since the '96 Atlanta Olympics. I even went to the "rock n roll gymnastics tour" after the Olympics wrapped while I was living in Indianapolis. It was a birthday gift I'll never forget. I'm a huge fan...I even got Shannon Miller's autograph about 10 years later in the Mall of America, I was the only person wanting an autograph who was over the age of 10. oh well. I don't care. Kevin made me get in line after I freaked out when I saw her sitting at the table signing autographs...I was instantly embarrassed to stand in line with those little girls, but after he announced "We've got her biggest fan, right over here" I accepted defeat and got in line so he'd shut up. ahh memories.


I'm sure you've seen the biggest choke of all time that happened last night. The reigning bronze medal Mens Gymnastics team totally Ray Finkled* their moment in the spot light. They didn't even televise our rotation on the rings---thats how bad it was. (that or they kicked us out and asked us to go work on our  cartwheels) We ended up in glorious 5th place. shame shame. better luck in Rio, guys.


This is turning into a novel and Im sorry. I'll just wrap this baby up by saying. Its Tuesday so Tosh.0 comes on tonight, and if you can tear yourself away from the Women's Gymnastics competition tonight (going for gold) and Missy Franklins swim, as well as Michael Phelps (going for 2 medals) swims tonight, then good on ya. Im not. Sorry Tosh. I love you long time.


bye folks!


*If you haven't seen Ace Ventura, slap yourself right now.